the doctor finally called...

the doctor (or nurse) finally called - only after I stalked her all afternoon yesterday. I literally called and just blurted out that I quit taking my meds and I needed to talk to a nurse immediately. That got me put on hold, then I called three more times and FINALLY they called me back.

I did quit taking my meds - I felt HORRIBLE on Wednesday and Thursday - my thyroid hit a new low and I was lathargic, couldn't think straight and just wanted to climb in bed. I didn't want to feel that way on Friday - so I didn't take my meds (since they make my thyroid slow down). Its weird - its like I can talk technical accounting when i get like that and I can do things on my own - but I can look straight at my staff and can't remember their name - and I have a hard time listening to other people and trying to help them out. I don't get it - and it is hard to explain. Thank God it doesn't happen that often - it is those one off days. The bad thing was that I had two in a row. On thursday night the depression hit - like a freight train. I don't know how to describe it - but it is like you are just totally out of whack and you just want to cry. I am tired of being out of whack - not knowing how I am going to feel when I wake up and what "version" of Karen you are going to get. the nice happy one, or the one that is on edge because her thyroid decided to screw up today.

Then the doctor told me to quit taking them for the rest of the weekend. they were obviously the cause making my thyroid get to this low point. of course, as soon as I stopped I felt normal again. All symptoms gone. Then Monday we are taking a much smaller dose. I went ahead and told her I wanted to kill it - the nurse said that they would call me on Monday with the surgeons name to call - it seems that the surgeon does both the radiodactive iodine and the surgery. I still don't know which route to take - if you do the radioactive iodine you do run the risk of not being able to have kids....so that is one reason that I might opt for the surgery. But then we have the blood thinner problem - that I would have to go off of and risk more blood clots.

*sigh*

such a hard decision. just keep me in your prayers that I can have a good surgeon that can help me make the right decision and that whatever that decision is that all goes well. I really need this done before the end of March. I know it is soon, but I am really tired of feeling bad and having no control. after the surgery / iodine it will still continue as we try to get it regulated, but hopefully that will be a bit easier since there is nothing "trying" to produce it and you trying to figure out how much it is producing and regulating with medicine- you are just trying to get the levels right with drugs.

so that is the update.

In other news - we have had two weird days at work - there has been an "electrical" problem and there has been this burning plastic smell that has brought the fire department to the office two times. Thursday they made us line up at the stairwell for more than an hour while the firemen and the company tried to figure it out. yesterday, they had a company wide meeting - they had all left to go to another floor and the smell came back. I sent an email to the building people and went to get some water. My partner came running with his computer in hand saying where is everyone - were we supposed to evacuate?!? he thought that since all the offices were empty that everyone had evacuated and they forgot to come get him. It was slightly comical.
But then they (the firemen) sent us home. at 4:15. I thought it was a gift from God since my partner likes to work late friday nights.

That meant I got to go to the dry cleaners, do 4 loads of laundry, put everything away and where it should be, clean the bathroom and kitchen and watch the whole season of Ugly Betty while having my favorite salad from Barnabys. It was totally a gift from God. Weird, but that is exactly how I like to spend my friday nights, being productive and just laying low. the today I got my car washed and now I feel like my life is back in order. Isn't it weird how just cleaning up can make you have a whole new perspective?!?

Too bad I am back at work this morning!!! But this should be one of the last weekends. Thank God for that too!!!