where do you put this thing?

I went today to go get my heart monitor that I am privledged to wear for the next 24 hours. I love it that the person who ALWAYS has to attach my heart monitors are men. It is just my luck. I walked into the room and he looked at me, and the first thing out of my mouth was "take it off?" he chuckled and nodded. Nothing like standing in a room with WINDOWS that start at about 3 feet off the floor and go straight up to the ceiling, in your nice black lace bra (yes, I forgot where I was going today when I selected what I was wearing, and yes, it is see through. awesome.) and just looking out the window while some guy rubs you down with a rough sponge, then alcohol then had to put all the electrodes on. And then he starts trying to figure out how to TAPE the wires to my body. I politely told him - we're fine, we don't need MORE tape (he already taped all the electrodes on - yes, I look like a freak) on my body. Thank goodness I'm not a man and really hairy - then this whole thing would REALLY suck! I'm just glad we were on the 20th floor and hopefully no one got to see the show.

I signed my life away (the monitoring machine costs $4000) and promised that I would have it back in more than 24 but less than 26 hours. No, I am not kidding. The note I had to sign made me promise I would have it back in 26 hours or I would pay for it. I asked the nice guy I flashed if they were kidding. He promptly told me they were not. Gees. This will be one appointment I will not be late for!!!!

The best part is there are 5 electrodes, each with their own wires, then a REALLY long wire cord too.....and there is literally no where for these wires to go (which is probably why he wanted to tape them!). So I totally just tucked them into my pants and went along my way. Then I realized every time you sit or walk they just get caught in the waistband of your pants and make it a bit uncomfortable. awesome. and then you can totally see them if they fall down your pant leg. really awesome. and don't think he didn't put the electrodes high enough on my chest that regardless of what I wear, you can see them.

I also have to record all my activities I do....I asked the guy - like, everything? he said everything. So I get the "recording card" and here are the activities it says to record: excercise, eating, smoking, urinating, bowel movements (do these really impact your heart rate?!?! seriously!), intercourse, sleeping, etc.

I was CRACKING up with some girls at work....so what if you put "intercourse" at 9 pm and then sleeping at 9:03. OR if you wrote that and ALL NIGHT LONG....Would the nurses crack up when they read it? that would just be awesome. But, I won't get to write down that activity. Oh, well. It does only gives you 27 lines to record for 24 hours of activity. That just doesn't seem near enough - but we will see.

This is the first test of the week....we still have the nuclear stress test, some blood tests, and the oh so lovely mammogram (which I don't know if I even mentioned, but family history and a great doctor who wants to monitor JUST in case, and I get to have my first one a few years early!).

So that is the update for now....the other good news is I haven't cried since Friday...which is AMAZING...and I don't feel as fuzzy headed either. Thank you Lord for taking that off my plate. I seriously needed that....